First day of school

With a degree of trepidation, the Educator walked back into school for the first time in six weeks. The children would return the following day and for now the prospect of meeting after meeting loomed large.

He paused for a moment whilst he mentally peeled off his real persona – the gentle family man who’d enjoyed spending time with his family, playing golf and sparking up the BBQ at any given opportunity – and put on his alter ego; The Educator!

Despite a propensity to perhaps over indulge during his time off, he didn’t mind what he became once through the school gates. He knew that it was a calling, a vocation of sorts to rid the Education system of the drivel and petty bureaucracy that exists. It protected him from the drudgery and any small victories were hugely satisfying.

The electronic gates clanged shut behind him shielding him from the outside world and slowly he could feel his powers beginning to return. He spied a colleague who gave him a cheery greeting. The Educator waved back, but noticed that the aforementioned colleague sported a new, slightly less grey, hairstyle than the previous term. With a mischievous grin he sent out his hair ray (designed to put paid to flicked fringes and Mohicans) and turned a patch on the back of his colleagues head back to the grey it had been before.

As he walked he felt all his powers returning and it was invigorating. The holiday had done him the world of good and he felt rejuvenated. He felt positive, ready to educate and to ‘facilitate learning’. He stopped for a moment and then nearly laughed out loud. Facilitate learning? What was he turning into? You’re a teacher he mentally chided to himself. Never forget that. You teach. Kids learn.

He looked around smiling at the joke he told himself and opened the door to the main hall. The room was buzzing with conversation and walking around he shook hands with many of his teaching brethren and shared the right amount of pleasantries before boredom set in. Excusing himself from a fascinating conversation on allotment vegetables, he found himself a quiet corner and sat down to watch the room without drawing too much attention to himself.

He smiled as the PE department bundled through the door, full of bravado, suntans and good humour. He admired their back slapping enthusiasm and enjoyed those moments he took a team or was involved in some sporting endeavour or other. The modern languages department followed close behind, relieved to be able to come in quietly behind the whirlwind of testosterone before them and timidly made their way as far away from them as possible to do.

And then Educator spied him.

The big boss man.

The headmaster.

Swimming through his staff like a shark, he firmly shook a hand here, shared a thought there and looked the epitome of good health. He caught the Educator’s eye and nodded a greeting across the room which he returned. And it was then that he caught it. That look in his eye. It seemed to reveal the Headmaster’s thoughts for a fleeting moment and too quickly he looked away. The Educator smiled to himself. The headmaster didn’t have a very good poker face.

The Educator caught his thoughts: wholsesale changes in the curriculum, development plans, philosophy for children, practice inspection lessons, staff meetings on Fridays after school and having to pay for school dinners. It didn’t bode well. 

Tut, tut thought the Educator as he watched the Headmaster bring the room to order. He avoided looking in the Educator’s direction and coughed before he began. The Educator sat up in his seat and with a gentle wave of the fingers of his left hand sent out his patented reality ray. That should do it he thought, sitting back and watching with interest.

The Headmaster paused for a moment as if thinking of what he should say. He looked momentarily confused before he began. What came out seemed to catch him by surprise but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Welcome back to everybody. I do so hope you’ve had a fantastic holiday. I for one think it will be a superb year. You are a highly talented staff and there’s nothing that I could possibly initiate that would make us, as a school any better. Keep up the good work and enjoy the pay rise that was promised you three years ago. School lunches for all staff will be free. I have also decided to cancel all meetings today. Get your classrooms ready and have a good term.”

For a moment the room was stunned into a stupefied silence. Was this really happening? The Educator started to clap and in an instant the room was standing and applauding the headmaster. The felt they ought to in case he came to his senses. Slightly embarrassed, the headmaster took the applause with good grace and as he left the room shot an angry glance at the Educator who smiled serenely, halo intact.